Saturday, January 15, 2005

When it became obvious that I didn't have any stinkin' WMD's--even the respected Russian news organization Pravda now says I had been telling the truth all along--Bush had to come up with new reasons to justify the invasion. He even went as far as to create a new cabinet level position, the Secretary of the Department of Excuses for Invading Peace Loving Nations That Have Never Done Anything Bad Except for Occasionally Invading Smaller Neighbors (EIPLNTHNDABEOISN). One of EIPLNTHNDABEOISN's more noble sounding reasons was the thing about making the world safer.

So.... Has deposing me (temporarily, of course) made the world safer from terrorists?

Well, according to a brand new CIA report, the answer to that question is a big fat stinkin' "No." In fact, Iraq has become the new breeding ground for the next generation of "professionalized" international terrorists. Not amateur terrorists, mind you, but professionalized ones.

What makes this even more hilarious is that previously the training ground was Afghanistan, which was somewhat remote and difficult to get to. But now, all these future terrorists are being trained right smack dab in the middle of the middle east, where it will be much easier for them to go back home to their oil-rich countries of Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, the Emirates, and Bahrain. Once there, they can use their newly honed skills against their own governments, which are currently chummy with the United States.

Well, President Bush kept insisting that Iraq was a haven for terrorists. Guess he FINALLY turned out to be right.