Last month a woman claimed to have found a fingertip in a bowl of chile she bought at Wendy's, an infidel fast food chain. She tried to sue the restaurant, but soon details of her past attempts to blackmail other companies began to surface. Furthermore, attempts by Wendy's to find the source of the missing finger proved to be about as successful as Bush's search for my WMD's.

Early yesterday police arrested the woman, charged her with grand larceny, and declared the whole thing a hoax.... Much like Bush's claim that I was up to my tuckus in WMD's--Not that I'm still dwelling on the subject.

Anyway, I guess I better drop my idea to claim I found a camel penis in my hummus.