More good news from the Guantanamo Bay prison: Even the US military now admits that the Koran was mishandled. One copy had urine splashed on it, a second one had a "two word obscenity" was written in English inside its cover, and another was deliberately kicked by a guard.

Ah, but the good news is that none were flushed down a toilet!

But the one that gets me is that several copies got wet while guards were throwing water balloons at the prisoners.

Water balloons!?!?!?!?

I'm quite proud of the many forms of torture that I have used on my people. Pulling fingernails out with pliers, attaching electrodes to nipples, hanging people from the ceiling by their testicles, cutting off limbs, etc. But I am ashamed to admit that I have never, ever, tried throwing water balloons at prisoners.

Those American guards are a truly sadistic bunch.