Monday, May 12, 2003

In my ongoing and oh-so-difficult quest to pretend I care what you, my loyal followers, think, I have come out with a new poll.

But first, here are the results to the previous poll, "What did I do with my (alleged) weapons of mass destruction?"

1) The hands down winner with 55% of the total (496 votes) was the answer, "They're on temporary loan to Syria."

2) 16% of you (144 votes) thought I hid them in my shorts. Well, you're close. That's where I keep my "Weapon of Mass Pleasure." And if the Dixie Chicks play their cards right, I'll let them take turns "launching" it.

3) Another 16% (143 votes) of you thought I "destroyed them in compliance with United Nations resolutions." Coincidentally, that was the same 16% of you that still believe in Santa Claus.

The rest of the questions ended up with single digit percentages. A total of 907 votes were cast.

So what does this poll mean? Well.... Not a damn thing. What do you think this is? A democracy? Grow up!!

I will eventually bring this poll back and rotate it with the new one.

Oh, and for the 16% of you that still believe in Santa: It IS true that there USED to be a Santa, but that is no longer the case.

I shot him last Christmas.