A special thanks to Rogue Element, who writes, I read your diary on a daily basis, and note that you mention the Mobile Weapons Labs. They were in fact Ice Cream Vans. The Ice Cream Vans were abandoned by Iraqi fighters, in case the US troops caught them eating the ice cream without paying for it. They are strictly NOT mobile weapons labs.

Thank you for your unflinching loyalty in the face of overwhelming odds, Rogue. I like your thinking. It shows originality, audacity, and the all-important "Who? Me? WMD's? Nope. Not I" attitude. So the question now becomes: Will the Americans fall for it? Michael Moore certainly would. Hell, he'd fall for ANYTHING containing the words "ice cream!!!" Throw in a slice of cheesecake and a couple of donuts, and Michael will swear that General Motors is the finest company on the face of Allah's green Earth!

But I'm not so sure about the CIA. Their standards for proof are a little higher. Then again, they did think my people would actually welcome an invasion by an army of heavily armed English speaking infidels, so maybe I'll need more cheescake after all.

At any rate, I have forwarded your comments and email address to the White House, so the officials from the Department of Homeland Insecurity should be coming by any day now to talk to you.

Have fun in Guantanomo Bay. Oh, and be watch out when Abdul drops the soap!