Thursday, August 21, 2003

Fervent loyalist and faithfull follower Tung Yin writes: Hey Saddamaster, not that you need my approval, but I totally approve of your figuring out how the monstrosity that is Episodes 1 and 2 came about. However, have you given thought also to the bastardized "Special Edition" movies? I mean, if that's legit, why can't you go back and put out a "Special Edition" of Gulf War 2 that "fixes" the . . . uh . . . mistakes(?) that were made?

Don't EVEN get me started on that special edition crap!!! Uh-oh, too late.....

Do you have any idea How many different versions of the three original Star Wars movies I have? Four!!! Like I don't have enough stuff to haul around in my non-descript 1973 Chevy Vega, I gotta drag twelve different slightly different versions of the same damn movies around with me! And the whole thing is just a scam perpetrated by Hollywood to get more money out of the poor saps that keep buying the stupid things. Hell, they may as well just stick a vacuum cleaner into my back pocket and suck the cash directly out of my wallet!! Actually, that might not be too bad if they would occasionally move the hose around to the front of my pants....

I'm not even sure what different ones I have. I know I have the original trilogy individually. Then I bought them as "deluxe" boxed sets (one pan & scan, the other wide-screen). THEN they came out with the Special Editions, which were digitally remastered AND had "never before seen" additional footage.

It's no wonder George Lucas can afford the taxes on that Skywalker Ranch of his.

And while we're on the subject, what is the deal with that Jar-Jar Binks? How did George Lucas go from creating the very macho Han Solo, to coming up with the inane Jar-Jar!?!?! He reminds me of some Episcopalian bishops I know.

As far as rewriting history, who do you think I am? Arnold Schwarzenegger? I can't just hop into a time machine and transport myself back naked into the middle of a desert. And then what would I do? Warn my younger self not to f*ck with anyone named President Bush?

Besides, standing around naked in the middle of a desert can get you sunburned on some VERY important parts!