I have to be more careful. My captors almost caught me in the General's office earlier this evening.

What happened was that I was reading an excerpt from that Bob Woodward book and I started laughing so hard, I fell out of the chair. The resulting commotion sent guards running down the hall to see what was going on. Fortunately I was able to elude capture by hiding under the desk, kind of like Monica used to do whenever she visited President Clinton in the Oval Office. Except, well, there was no one sitting in the chair this time.

The part that got to me was the description of a party at the Vice President's house a few days after the so-called "fall of Baghdad." Dick "I'm a Scary Psycho" Cheney, Paul "Half-Wit" Wolfowitz, and some others were laughing about how easily the war had gone, and how very wrong the Bush Administration's critics had been. They even went on to mock Colin Powell, who had been against the invasion in the early days of its planning.

I'm guessing they're not laughing any more.

The other item from the Woodward book that's beginning to raise a stink is the $700 million that was intended for the Afghan war but was diverted to fund early planning for my invasion. That's a big no-no under that pesky Constitution thing the United States has, and some Senators are none too happy about it.