My apologies for not posting in several days, but I've been chained to the bars of my cell for most of the week.... No, no, I wasn't being tortured by the guards. What happened is that Barbara Striesand was paying me a conjugal visit and her husband called just as we were getting hot and heavy. She had to hurry home--something about people who need people--and she forgot about me!

Anyway, I'd like to offer a belated congratulations to my good friend and loyal supporter Michael Moore for his big win at the Cannes Film Festival. His movie Fahrenheit 9/11 has been getting rave reviews around the world, yet remains strangely unavailable to audiences in America.

---------------Mike Luckovich, Atlanta Journal-Constitution

If you're not familiar with the film, it is very anti-Bush. Yet, according to those who have seen it, it is also very well done.

Oh, and by the way, it's only called Fahrenheit 9/11 in the United States and Great Britain. In the rest of the world it is being released as Celsius 488.33333.