President Bush continues to tell Americans he is the candidate best able to protect them.

Personally, I'm inclined to believe him. After all, it's been scientifically proven that even the dumbest rats in a maze learn through their mistakes. Now don't misunderstand me: I'm not trying to insult Mr. Bush by calling him a rodent. I merely used that particular comparison because of the similar IQ's involved. And in the case of the President, he certainly learned something when he chose to completely ignore Richard Clarke's warnings about Al Qaeda in early 2001.

You know what else Bush reminds me of? Abusive husbands. Seriously, think about it: Such men are always telling their wives that no one else will love them, that no one else can take care of them, so "you can't leave me." And that's exactly what his campaign has been saying lately.