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President Bush is delivering his annual State of the Union address even as I write this, but I have decided to skip it. Unless he is prepared to admit that he was wrong, I was right, and that the United States government is prepared to offer $500 billion in damages to Iraq, then there's is absolutely nothing he could say that would be of interest to me.

I'm sure, however, that instead of taking responsibility for his actions, the President is instead going off on another of his "Freedom on the March" delusions. Freedom is NOT on the march, folks. It is in full retreat from the superior forces of despotism and tyranny, which are the wave of the future.

Now I'm sure some of you think ol' Saddam is cracking up again. Go ahead, admit it. Raise your hands if you think I'm nuts....

Okay, thanks. You may put your hands down now, and take a few minutes to prepare your last wills and testaments. I can't believe you idiots were stupid enough to openly disagree with me!

Anyway, Bush and a few of his fellow western leaders continue to believe that freedom and democracy will continue to dominate the world. The fact is, however, that more and more ordinary citizens are beginning to realize that government oppression is actually much more efficient. For example, some fancy American foundation recently conducted a survey of high school students and their feelings about the First Amendment.

What they found was quite revealing: 36% of them believe that newspapers should get government approval of stories before publishing them. Additionally, 32% of those surveyed said that the press enjoys too much freedom in the United States.

It gives me hope to know that the future of the United States is in such capable hands!!